Pilate Says, "Being Kind and Gentle Doesn't Take Away Your Strength"

Pilate's POV

Hey, y'all, for those of you who don't know me, my name is Pilate Dead and this is my story. Before you read this you should know, this ain't just another rant from an African American woman but rather I want to fill you in on my life and the things I had to overcome.

My entire life revolves around my beautiful daughter and granddaughter, Reba and Hagar. My only regret was not showing them how important they were to me and showing them how loved they truly are. 

I know some of you are very confused about my name but you should know that it was randomly chosen from the Bible. But personally, I like to believe that my name speaks to who I am and what I represent. Even though I might seem insecure at times due to my absent navel and my isolation from my family, I have taught myself how to thrive and live on my own. 

I hate labeling myself as a victim but it is clear that racism did not do me any favors, I try to leave that in my past and do my part in imparting wisdom on my family and helping others. Now, if my saying that I am kind and selfless makes me seem weak, think again. When someone hurt my precious Reba, I didn't hesitate to plunge a knife straight towards the heart of that worthless creature. Even though I might be rocking it in my sixties, no one messes with my family. 

However, I will never forgive myself for Hagar's death. I blame not only myself but the darkness in society that made my sweet granddaughter feel ugly and unloved when she is the most beautiful thing I know of. I hope that as she watches down from Heaven, she can see each and every one of us giving her love from beyond the grave. 

So I truly hope that my story will help incite good values in each one of you. I stay true to myself in being gentle and loving but in no way does that diminish my strength. I have discovered that I can fly even if I am not soaring in the sky, I simply have to come to terms with my life and be okay with that.